what to eat (and what not to drink) to sleep better

Nine days ago I started shrinking the size of my coffee cups. After downsizing to a small cup, and going “half and half” on the caffeine/decaf, I finally made it to day one of “tea only” this past Friday. This puts me at four days coffee free today. Yes, tea does have caffeine in it, but green tea has less than coffee (black tea has more caffeine than coffee). I am drinking orange blossom green tea in the morning and chamomile at night. In August I started a new goal of having one cup of tea a day, so giving up coffee has given me a boost in achieving this by opening the slots to be filled with a new beverage.

I have noticed many changes this week in myself physically, and mentally. I suppose I can start by discussing how over the last two years I had been dealing with physical stressors on my body, one example being chest pains. After two visits to the doctor and an echocardiogram last fall it was decided the chest pains were from stress, but these pains came and went for almost two years, sometimes lasting for hours. Yes, they did appear more frequently during times of stress, but sometimes they would appear without any trigger reason to explain it.
I had also experienced waves of sleeping really well, and waves of not sleeping at all. I exercise frequently; take warm showers before bed and more recently have turned off all electronic devices one hour before bed time to decrease stimulation. This summer however, I am sure I was passing out from exhaustion, but not truly sleeping. I would pass out easily before 11pm, wake up around 1 or 2 am and struggle falling back asleep for hours. As if chest pains and insomnia weren’t enough, I experienced feeling tense. This feeling was something I didn’t even realize I had so badly until it went away. With each passing day that I walked further away from multiple cups of coffee, I began feeling lighter. It is difficult to explain, but what I think started happening was the tension, jitter feeling, and anxiety that caffeine has been known to cause was starting to leave my system. Even though I have felt small moments of stress this week, I don’t physically feel the same level of tightness in my chest and arms that I had come to accept as “stress”.

I believe the combination of actual stress and caffeine created tension, and anxiety had created for me a supernova of physical symptoms. Caffeine can stay in the blood system for up to 8 hours. This means afternoon coffee before class at 4 pm (which I did all the time), could keep me wired well until midnight. When I wake up in the morning the first thing I put in my body? A cup of coffee. I had realized during this week that I was probably spending over 20 hours a day with caffeine in my system on some level. Over a period of months and years, this can lead to not only the addiction I had, but absolutely can explain chest pains, jitter, tension, anxiety, and trouble sleeping. Holy ****, how can I stick up for a coffee addiction now? Look at that powerhouse list of awful symptoms I just wrote out. Since slowly decreasing my intake, I have been falling asleep much easier. But it is not just the falling asleep that matters, since I have been able to fall asleep in the past. It is the fact that I have not woken up in the middle of the night that resonates the most with me.

I jokingly tell others that the only way to explain the release of tension in my chest and arms, combined with the drowsy feeling I am still experiencing, is to say I feel sedated. Last night I compared myself to a Koala bear, which is known to lie in the trees gnawing on eucalyptus, which has a chemical component in the leaves that make the bears drowsy. Despite my comparison to a bear that appears stoned all day long, I still feel a massive improvement in my body and mind in only 9 short days of beginning this dietary change. I am sleeping through the night, feel calmer, and even notice myself clenching less. Actually, I haven’t clenched any muscles or my jaw at all this week. My goodness, all this time I was either accepting these things as stress, or not even noticing they were happening until they went away.

If you are having trouble sleeping, but are not addicted to caffeine as a possible reason for it, I have dietary suggestions for you as well. Tryptophan is an amino acid found in eggs, cheese, and turkey which causes a feeling of sleepiness. Foods with tryptophan combined with a carbohydrate make for the best evening meals or snacks to assist the body in winding down for bed. Turns out, “breakfast for dinner” can be acceptable here. Try scrambled eggs for dinner with one slice of whole wheat toast, or snacks such as a low fat cheese stick with cherry tomatoes and whole wheat crackers, or a few slices of turkey (for the meat eaters) on a rice cake. Walnuts also aid in sleep (and you only need 4 to reap this benefit, which is good considering walnuts are a high calorie food). You can also try sprinkling four walnuts into a low fat yogurt cup as a bedtime snack. Before I would ever recommend a sleep aid or medication to anyone, I would suggest all of the above. You may find a few eggs before bed does the trick, or you may (like me) realize giving up a food or beverage made a difference in how you feel. Nutrition is the front line in how our bodies function, and we should be adjusting here before giving up hope that we will never sleep or feel well.

(I think I will be switching to decaf from now on when I miss the taste of coffee, but I am not thinking too far ahead. For now, I am enjoying the feeling of it leaving my system, and the chance to start fresh).

the road to herbal teas

So the ayurveda detox has been postponed one week. This being for two reasons: After glancing at my calendar I realized this upcoming week is, ahem, my week. And I would like one reason to feel fatigued and irritable at any given time, not two. More importantly, since I decided to do this so last minute I didn’t have enough time to wean off of coffee. I have learned in the past that going cold turkey on caffeine is probably one of the most torturing things I could do to myself. I want to enjoy the detox, not set myself up for failure; so I think if I have an extra week to slowly decrease my intake I could be more successful. This leads us to this morning. Sunday morning and I am up bright and early at wholefoods. I love the coffee there so I get on line at the bakery section. I look up at the chalkboard menu: (inner monologue) “lets see…what sizes do they have…20oz…16oz….12oz. I usually get 16 so today I guess I should get the 12”.

Wholefoods Man: “Next! Yes miss what can I get for you?”
Me: (All smiles) “Hi! Can you just hold up the 12oz cup I want to see how big it is”
Man: (holds up cup, smiles)
Me: (raises one eyebrow). Now I’m pissed. And so it begins. I can’t believe what a little monster I turn into when I try to cut back on this stuff. “Ok, thanks. Yea I’ll just have that size coffee with room for milk please”. (Why cruel world!? Why!?)

I understand that for someone who blogs on health I may be coming off as a complete lunatic right now. It is not healthy to have a caffeine addiction. Mine started innocently enough when my first job in the city required me to show up at 5:15am every day. I remember saying to a co worker, “how am I going to do that?” My manager overheard me and replied “with a lot of coffee.” I should send her the bill one day I suppose. But truth be told, not only am I addicted to coffee; I actually enjoy the taste. I really like it. Ideally, I would drink it every other day and not “require” it to feel OK. Now when I skip, I get headaches and feel fuzzy. It is difficult for me to concentrate and then I become really…really…cranky. I’ve tried a few times to quit or cut back. The first time was in 2007 when I was working in a pre sale office right before opening a new gym. I remember my boss looking at me and saying (in a way that made me laugh) “what did I tell you!? No new habits, no new boyfriends, no quitting anything! Everything stays the same until this gym is open!” There I was in the middle of the work day barely able to make phone calls and my boss is pacing around: “someone get her a coffee! I can’t do this!” As if the stress of my healthy living attempt was going to just kill him. He bought my coffees for a few days until I snapped and went back. Coffee: 1, Jessica: 0.
So I had my 12oz this morning and enjoyed it with agave and soy milk as I browsed up and down the aisles food shopping. I picked up bell peppers for dinner, strawberries, wheat crackers, and veggie burgers. I spent the mid day baking chocolate beer cupcakes with a baileys butter cream frosting for my roommates birthday which is tomorrow. I sprinkled green sugar sprinkles on top of each frosted cupcake. He is Irish, he likes to drink, and he roots for Michigan State (green and white colors): these cupcakes are all him. And he deserves them for living with me, being so nice, and always snaking our shower drain.


(Patricks Birthday Cupcakes: Chocolate Beer Cupcakes with Baileys Buttercream Frosting for the big 2-6).

Throughout the day I thought everything was great, but now I am feeling that fuzzy feeling again. Although I managed pretty well today, I am sure that I need to have the 12oz again tomorrow. I plan on going from 12 to 8oz, to 4oz, and then the last 2 days to go to green tea before the detox starts and I am entirely off caffeine. This is definitely going to be a challenge for me, but I have to try.
Moral of this story? It wouldn’t be smart to dive into any diet change without properly assessing where you stand now. Sometimes we just need to take smaller steps to get to where we want to be, but no matter the size of the step, just keep walking in the right direction and you will eventually get there.


(with my little gem, she's having a great Saturday, talking vegetarianism with auntie jess).

Til next time my friends,


“the brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all”

“no one can make you feel inferior, without your consent”

The Ayurveda Fall Detox

Last October I wrote some blogs on my experimental blue print juice cleanse. I never finished the project, partially because it didn’t turn out the way I expected, and partially because I believe I was traumatized from it and blocked out most of my memory from the three day nightmare. I was embarrassed to admit to my professors that I had voluntarily signed up for a three day cleanse that involved only drinking juices. As a graduate nutrition student, I should know better. I read the testimonials of others who had done it, and I searched the website for proof that this could detoxify me. I believed what I read and justified that if others were swearing they still had energy to work out while on the cleanse, than I would be fine. I understand there are people out there who have had positive experiences with not eating for a few days and “purifying” their systems through juice. Not only am I not one of those people; I comprehend how we digest our food and the importance of our digestive system and keeping it working. I do not recommend any sort of diet, or cleanse that tells you to stop eating. On my three day experiment I suffered headaches, nausea, weakness, irritability, and eventually threw up my first foods consumed when I broke the cleanse. Our gastro intestinal system is composed of muscles. Like any other muscle in the body they need to be used. When people go on lengthy (and I mean greater than my measly three days) cleanses, they weaken their G.I. system. Like a pair of legs that has been in a bed for weeks, it does not function the same. We need food to function, and what my body was experiencing was an extremely low caloric intake leading to low blood sugar levels, in combination with a halt on my caffeine intake (something my body was not prepared for, as my 72 hour migraine reminded me. That one is my fault. Coffee addict. Guilty).

Anyway. That was October 2010. Now we are approaching October 2011 and here I am again. Since I fall somewhere in between a holistic woman and a firm believer in everything western nutrition teaches us; I have been previously conflicted between “cleanse” and “just eat your 5 food groups”. As a curious one always searching for ways to improve my inner Chi, I am experimenting again. This time, I hope to be more successful. I am going to try an Ayurveda cleanse. Below is the background of Ayurveda, taken from Yoga Journal and written by Scott Blossom.

“Ayurveda, which translates as "knowledge of life," dates back 5,000 years to the ancient Sanskrit texts, the Vedas. It's a system of healing that examines physical constitution, emotional nature, and spiritual outlook in the context of the universe. According to the philosophy, universal life force manifests as three different energies, or doshas, known as vata, pitta, and kapha. We're all made up of a unique combination of these three forces. Though everyone has some of each, most people tend to have an abundance of one or two of the doshas. This unique combination is determined at the moment of conception, and is your own personal blueprint, or prakriti (nature). As you move through life, the proportion of each of the three doshas constantly fluctuates according to your environment, your diet, the seasons, the climate, your age, and many other factors. As they move into and out of balance, the doshas can affect your health, energy level, and general mood”

The reason why I was drawn to this fall detox was because it spoke of lifestyle goals that matched my own. The detox is combined with daily yoga classes, meditation twice a day, and recipes. I get to eat Kitchari which I will make for myself each day along with herbal teas, coriander chutney, and apples and avocados if I wish to snack more. Kitchari is the staple food and is meant to decrease internal toxicity, but I also feel that taking time to cleanse is so much more than just the food I will eat. Since I believe that health is mental, physical, and social: I also believe a cleanse should be mental, physical, and social. Food is powerful and I have no doubt that a combination of ingredients can purify our systems, but when do we detoxify our lives outside of food? When was the last time you sat down and thought about anything toxic you were keeping in your life, and then went through a painful week of ridding it? We don’t tend to do that, do we? It's not just food, it's feeling happy on the inside, and living in a way that inspires your own health all the way down to who you socialize with. I may not tell anyone to juice for a week, but the partially holistic woman in me does believe if I breathe better, digest better, and become more aware of choices I make other than the food I eat, that I can continue being the happy girl I am. I do believe that. So for me, while I cannot yet prove anything and do not know for sure if this cleanse will be successful; I am absolutely willing to try a week of particular ingredients, daily yoga, and a hell of a lot of time in silence. I also have been reading on certain poses to lie in for extended periods of time that is said to aid in digestion. I am intrigued. Who knows, if this works I may pull a Liz Gilbert and Eat Pray Love my way through being 26 years old.



(Kitchari dish with herbal tea and coriander chutney)


There are two great times to cleanse if you are interested and those two are the spring season and the fall. Spring tends to be more popular since we always come off winter feeling quite heavy and desperate to de puff before the beaches open. Fall though is a great time to prepare for the changes that will happen to our body in the winter, while also strengthening our immune system; since winter is a time many of us get sick. For this reason I am interested in the fall detox. I want to be ready in case another harsh winter hits nyc, and the stress of my final exams attempts a hit at my immune system. (Also, I may eat a lot more fruit in the summer time, but I also drink a lot more margaritas). Since the change in season always seems to begin new chapters, I am truly open to seeing how much I can let in right now. So I think based on what I just wrote, I am about to embark on a week of no red wine, cheese, or chocolate (my personal struggles).
And if it doesn’t work, well then I have only lost one week.

Love from my little heart

the dog days are over

This summer I believe the Universe challenged me. That is what I will say anyway, when I look back on it. It seemed just when I thought I was pushed down, I was kicked while I lay there on the floor. It made for a different version of myself. A woman who didn't always know what to do or say, (and I always have something to say) or if I was making the right decisions (and I almost always believe I am right). I kept waiting for summer to end. As if the leaves changing color would bring about a change in my luck. But before I give this time period of my life the final kiss goodbye,(which I am doing this week) I decided to pull a complete 180 on my grudge with it. This is what I am choosing to take away from it instead:

For my last weekend of the season, I have a beautiful wedding that I am so excited for. I get to witness two people get married who I have known since they started dating (and I shot gunned my invite to the wedding). I have a royal blue sari to wear, a hennah tattoo to look forward to, and tons of vegetarian Indian food to eat up. What a great kick off to labor day weekend, and how fortunate that they booked this upcoming weekend and not the one that just passed. Irene really could have been a wet blanket on such a joyous occasion.

(me and my best gals braving the hurricane in an irish bar, with live irish music. A nyc hurricane/evacuating my apartment and fleeing to brooklyn with amazing friends. The reason why summer 2011 was unique)



Being that I was out of work this summer, I had a lot of time to spend alone, sit in the park, attempt to get a tan, or...hop on the train to head home. While long island is full of great beaches, I had a way better reason to head out east. And with no work to be at, I was able to spend a lot more time out there these last two months with my friend and her new family. I even got to go on a 10 day vacation with them in Pennsylvania.

(Brianna Michelle born June 18th. The one reason why Summer 2011 was an absolute miracle).






My birthday is in July. And while this birthday really freaked me out admittedly so, I sure did enjoy showering others with birthday love. A bunch of my friends celebrated birthdays as well, and I spent hours baking in my kitchen for all the special occasions. Sometimes, it was no ones birthday, and I baked anyway. During times of madness, one could say butter and sugar are therapeutic. I swear there were times when I was certain my friends would find me in my kitchen, surrounded by cupcake liners with flour on my nose. "She's finally lost it" they'd say.

The doormen in my building have received so many cakes/cookies/cupcakes from me, that I think they are beginning to doubt whether I actually am a nutrition student.

(Baking for myself, but more importantly others. The reason why summer 2011 was delicious).



I was six years old when I moved to my hometown. One of my first play dates there was with a girl in my first grade class, and her cousin Rich. Rich and I would grow up to be great friends. I would sit in his living room while him and my other best friend Mark would rehearse their band for school shows. We went trick or treating together. Went off to prom weekend together. And when we were 19 Rich told us he was going to become a priest. This past June, I watched my friend who made me laugh, inspired me, and always got me through forensics class, become an ordained priest. During the church services I sat next to Mark. I couldn't help but think how different all of our lives had become; how much we've grown up. But I love them exactly the same today as I did when I was 15. They are just the best. And my goodness do those two make me laugh. I am so lucky to still have them in my life, even if we don't get to see each other every day anymore.



(Watching Rich take on the priesthood. The reason Summer 2011 gave me goosebumps).







I guess when I look back on this time, I will say this summer was Organic. Like a piece of organic fruit: It was unadulterated, flawed, but full of goodness in one way or another. I am still excited for fall though. Even though the summer had some things to be proud of, I am ready to return to having more control over my life. I have new classes to look forward to, apple crisps to bake, football facts to learn, and weekends to hopefully go apple picking or frolick in a pumpkin patch. I love this upcoming time of year, and I am actively choosing to not harp on the summer of challenges and sadness; no no, I cannot taint the fall season like that.




“For a long time it had seemed to me that life was about to begin - "real life". But there was always some obstacle in the way, something to be gotten through first, some unfinished business, time still to be served, or a debt to be paid. Then life would begin. At last it dawned on me that these obstacles were my life. This perspective has helped me to see there is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way".- Fr. Alfred D'Souza

"when everything is out, you gotta take it in"

After two weeks without yoga due to time frolicking in the woods taking part in pudding eating contests, last night I returned to my safe haven on St Marks. I felt like the Tin Man who needed to be oiled; it had been too long since I stretched into downward dog. Yoga has played an integral role in my health over the last year and even more so in the last few months. Allow me to share my class with you tonight, and explain just how much this practice is doing for me these days. I am still very much a beginner, but I love how much I have to look forward to in working towards my new found goals.

There are so many reasons why I began going to class, and after I started practicing I came up with a whole other list of reasons to stay with it. Physically it is helping me maintain flexibility which I started rapidly losing once I stopped dancing. It is also helping to make sure my hips (which are a mess from years of dance) are able to be rehabilitated. It helps relieve the tension I carry in my neck, my posture, my alignment, and most importantly keeps my tush lifted and my arms toned. Yoga does my body good. Mentally, it trains me to leave my problems and worries on the “outside of my mat” for the 60 minutes during class, therefore giving my brain a break as well. This is hard to do and takes an insane amount of effort from me to keep thoughts out of my head and focus only on poses and breathing. The benefits though are incredible. After not thinking of my troubles for an hour, I feel as if I lost weight when class is over. I actually feel lighter. My head feels happy. And the more I practice, the closer I feel myself becoming able to actually meditate. Meditating is something I always assumed would never be possible for me. When I lie down and close my eyes I see my grocery list, my pile of laundry, and assignments that are due at school. Then I start going down the list of obligations:
“need to buy that congratulations card for the “so and so”s for their new baby girl. Must write check out for Time Warner Cable before end of day. Need a new metro card. How much money do I want to put on the metro card? Is an unlimited worth it for me? I haven’t left the upper east side all summer. Maybe that’s the problem. I am going to buy an unlimited metro card tonight and then spend the rest of my summer exploring the east and west village via public transportation.” I mean really. Stop talking Jessica. But I am getting much much better these days at shutting that girl up during yoga, and it’s making me really, really happy.

Tonights class was perfect. The moment class started as I sat there on my mat, my hips feeling tighter than ever, the most intense thunderstorm began outside. There I was in a room with 60 people, a wonderful instructor, beautiful music playing, and a thunderstorm to orchestrate the whole thing. The room was dark and three perfect windows allowed us to watch the grey skies and rain hit on its side from the wind. Our instructor says “allow your outside thoughts to disappear for now, focus on the rain, focus on the thunder, and focus on waking up your body”. I pictured myself on a megaphone waking my body up, and I could almost hear the creaking noises as my ankles rotated and my wrists began to hold my body in a push up position.

Early in the hour is one of my favorite parts of class. The “chair” pose. In this pose you keep your toes and knees facing forward, feet hip distance apart, and you squat to a low level where it appears you are sitting in a tiny, invisible chair. Stretching your arms up over your head, widening your fingers, and tilting your head towards the sky; this position becomes heated very quickly. The class is often heard making noises, breathing deeply, or laughing as we all are shaking and ready to fall to the floor. During this part I think to myself “you love this pose. This pose has allowed you to pee in public bathrooms easily without ever having to touch the seat. This pose is what helps you reach those goals for your lifted, toned, grab-able tush. If you quit early on this pose, you are quitting on your tush”.
And then I laugh. By the time I entertain myself with that thought, the instructor tells us we can drop to the floor.

The class gradually becomes more difficult. We are asked in our push up position to lower ourselves 2/3 of the way and hold it. Here comes more moans, and I can hear my sweat hitting my mat. It makes a "tap" sound. Instructor says (in a very inspirational tone of voice) “if you are unable to do this part, then go into childs pose that is OK. This is your class and you have the right to feel motivated the entire time, but remember you must practice on motivating yourself because I won’t always be here”.
You see, yoga does not just physically and mentally train me; it gives me a moment like that where a giant light bulb over my head is turned on by wise words of a 20 something instructor at a donation based yoga studio in the East Village. I believe her. So as the next bead of sweat drips into my left eye, I go back down into my half push up and hold it there. Until I fall. And I am OK with falling. It means I tried until the end.

The most challenging part of class for me is the “pigeon” pose, which is meant to open your hips. My hips are in so much pain, and they certainly cannot do what they were asked to do 10 years ago for competition dancing. We are expected to sit in this pose for some time, and bring our focus back to relaxing and breathing. My awesomely wise instructor continues to motivate:
“During class you may have had moments where your mind slipped again into thoughts of what you are doing after class, or what you need to do tomorrow morning, or what may be bothering you these days. Take this time to bring it back, even if you have to say to yourself “I am inhaling, 1..2..3..4..I am exhaling, 1..2..3..4, I am inhaling 1..2..3..4..”

So that is what I did. I started saying to myself over and over again that I was inhaling and exhaling. It helped. It temporarily chased away my side thoughts that had been creeping into my time on my mat. I spend every other minute of every other day with an over active brain. If I don’t put it to rest during yoga, then it doesn’t get put to rest that week. This is a very important goal of mine, to be able to put my over active brain on hold. I make it through pigeon, and we close with some ab work before going into our final position of rest. The storm lasted the entire class. In fact, I even walked to the subway after in the rain. I went home, baked a batch of “lemonade cupcakes”, showered, and went to bed. I feel like I did something good for myself tonight, and I am happy I marched myself downtown for it.

I leave for you the song that was playing in class as the thunderstorm rolled by, and I sat in my pigeon pose working on my hips. It is a beautiful version of “I want to hold your hand”, and I had a picture perfect moment with it in class.
In good health,
Namaste <3

It really is the most important meal of the day!

Studies show that those who eat breakfast every day are more successful with weight loss and weight management than those that don’t. But even with the "proof in the pudding", there are people out there who believe skipping the breaking of the fast is one way to cutting down calories and therefore cutting down on weight. Let it be told here on this blog, that our bodies are much more efficient in doing their job when they are receiving the nutrients they need to function, consistently.
Skipping meals is so ten years ago.
One reason why eating breakfast may be linked to weight control is that the hunger and dissatisfaction from not eating in the morning can lead to a feeling of deprivation, and therefore poor nutrition choices throughout the rest of the day including at lunch and dinner. Those who eat breakfast have not only reported feeling satisfied throughout the day, they are more likely to have healthy balanced meals and to maintain an exercise program. Remember that this does not mean pastries for breakfast. Donuts, bagels, and other breakfasts high in fat and sugar are full of "empty calories" which will give you caloric intake, but no nutrients to better your health or keep you feeling full. They are in fact, a waste of numbers. The true benefits of breakfast come from meals high in protein and whole grains.

Benefits to eating breakfast every day include:
Weight loss/Weight control
Kick starting your metabolism
Improved concentration for the days work
More likely to have a complete diet balanced in all macro and micro nutrients
Lower cholesterol levels

I encourage you to start your day with a variety of crafty meals, packed with nutrients of course so you get more bang for your buck. To help get you started, here is one recipe already done for you. This meal is high in fiber, vitamins, and "good" carbohydrates. Oh, and with the small amount of dark chocolate, you can shout in the name of antioxidants and not feel guilty so soon after the alarm goes off. There is fiber in the oats (which keep you feeling full and keep your colon clean), vitamins in the fruit (to protect your immune system) and enough Carbohydrates to protect your brain and give your body the energy it needs to sit at your desk for the day ahead. Give it a go. And don't forget: Consistent breakfasts packed with nutrients will help you function better at work, keep you in a good mood, and keep your metabolism moving at a pace you prefer.

Banana Split Oatmeal
Cook a 1/2 cup of dry old-fashioned one-minute oats with water (to desired consistency) and top with 1/4 cup strawberries, 1/4 cup sliced banana, 1 Tbsp semisweet dark chocolate chips, and 2 Tbsp almonds. Total Calories = 359


(don't like strawberries or banana? try blueberries and kiwi, apples and cinnamon, or any other fruit combination your heart yearns for).

Now go off into the world. Your stomach is thanking you for not forgetting about it so early in the day.

“I am a vegetarian, I’m sorry”

Why is it whenever I leave the city I find myself saying those words? I forget what a freak I am considered outside my borough. After being away for the last 10 days I am home again, in my comfy bed, and snacking on a cup of mixed berries. My experience in the woods has once again left me happy, yet laughing quite a bit over how many people I made uncomfortable during meal times. These experiences inspired me to write. It was family vacation time. Not my biological family, but a family that is very much a part of my so important world. I am the complete opposite of all of them, making me the perfect “adopted child”. With 8 adults, tons of friends, and a 7 week old baby; we spent our time competing in games, dancing, boating, listening to acoustic music on the lake, and well….eating.
Here at home I am the only vegetarian of all my friends, and yet it doesn’t seem to be an issue when we eat out. Everyone knows I don’t eat meat, no questions are really asked anymore, and I don’t smell bacon and run out of a room gagging…I am pretty easy to be around as a carnivore. So it always cracks me up when I get a somewhat new audience, or when a waiter gets that nervous look on his face. This always tends to happen when I am no longer in the city of vegan, raw, macrobiotic, or vegetarian fusion restaurants. Here in PA, our waiter comes over to give us our dinner choices.
“we have a champagne chicken served over wild rice, a pork tenderloin, or the tilapia. We also have all of our daily options, beef angus burgers, childrens chicken tenders, French fries, and some vegetables will come out to the table family style”.

Me: “I’m sorry, I’m a vegetarian”
Waiter: “we have pasta?”

Why do I apologize? Honestly, I don't really know. I become nervous sometimes (especially when eating at someones house) because I know once I share this fact about myself, some will become stressed. I don't want to stress someone out over my dinner plate. Really, it is not a big deal to me. Which is why sometimes if I can get by, I don't share the information at all. Should I apologize? Again, I don't really know. I shouldn't have to apologize for a lifestyle choice of mine that doesn't hurt anyone, but I apologize because I want the person to know that I am OK with the fact that meat is all around. I'm just trying to make the scene a comfortable one. People, this may sound dramatic but I kid you not. The meat eaters and vegetable eaters often have awkward moments together.

So this brings me to my next observation. After I utter the horrid words to the new audience, my top three responses are as follows:
1.Oh really? What do you eat!?
2.Wow, How do you get your protein?
3.From the waiter/waitress….”we have pasta?”

And these are my answers, my dear meat eating friends:
1.I eat the food that comes from the remaining 4 food groups. Meat only takes up one of those little slots in the pyramid you know.
2.Americans are overdosing on protein. I get mine from peanut butter, eggs, beans, lentils, cheese and quinoa. And yes, it is possible to overdose on protein. I am more concerned about my B12 as a vegetarian, which is the only (only) vitamin that is solely available through red meat. Currently I take a B12 supplement each morning. Also currently, I am not deficient in any vitamins or minerals, I have been checked by the doc.
3.Pasta is great…but I don’t need to rely on it in order to be full. I eat tons of different meals with a variety of ingredients every day. Becoming a vegetarian does not mean the bagel & pasta diet. Also Mr. Waiter…stop looking so scared. I do not sit in my room sucking on lettuce. I am a normal (eh, maybe I shouldn’t push it) girl.

I encountered a similar experience while I was traveling in Ireland. Land of the beef stew, I was given multiple perplexed looks when I asked for a cheese and tomato sandwich every day instead. At home I feel so welcomed and accepted when I sit at a restaurant and order the sweet potato casserole dish (my favorite at Candle Café, it is served with steamed greens, black beans, and a vegan country gravy). But I think I forget that us veggie loving “tree huggers” as we are called, are often the minority group once we leave our nest. People are nervous around us, and they believe on some level….that we are always starving. How do I convince those around me that I am actually full off of a vegetarian meal? Years of practice!

But really, whenever I travel, whether it is to Ireland or a few states over; I am prepared to spend days eating peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, cheese and tomato, and lots of pasta! When I return home, I go right back to my freakish ways of sautéed kale, quinoa salad, and bowls of berries. What can I say? Love me for who I am. A happy and outgoing vegetarian. I do not eat meat. I like to dance. And new to my list: I can successfully feed, burp, and sing to a 7 week old baby. Yes, I sang. She is too young to tell me I am not that great.
Manhattan I missed you, lets wrap this summer up.
Love from back home
Jess